Weighing Matters

my journey to b.e.t.t.e.r


Ok, this is depressing. If you’re already in a good mood, turn away! Quickly!

I knew things were feeling a little uncomfortable and a lot tighter the last week. So in the interest of complete disclosure and being totally honest with myself — something I’ve been forcing me to do thoughout this journey even when it’s not something I’m proud of — I took measurements this morning and sure enough, they’re up.

I knew it. I could feel it.

The last time I measured was November 11th. Why? Because I thought I’d never have to deal with gaining/losing again! Did I really believe that? I think I did. I thought this has taken me so so long I will never lose control again. But wow. What a boomerang! It came back and hit me right in the head!

So —  just trying for straight-forward openness. These were the numbers [the last in each row] on November 11th.

Bust was 40, then 38, then 37.5, then 37.5, then 37
Waist was 34, then 31, then 31, then 30.5, still 30.5
Abdomen was 40.5, then 36.5 then 35.5, then 34.5, still 34.5
Hips were 41, then 38.5, then, 38, then 37.5, still 37.5
Thigh was 24.75, then 22.75, then 22.25, then 22, then 21.5
Arm was 13.5, then 12, then 12, then 11.75, then 11.5

This morning I noticed I have gained pounds and inches.

Bust: 37 [same]
Waist: 31 [up .5]
Abdomen: 35.5 [up 1]
Hips: 37.5 [same]
Thighs: 22.5 [up 1]
Arm: 12 [up .5]

SEE how exact this science is! It’s Physics! Gain weight, gain the exact amount in inches. Lose weight lose the exact amount in inches.

Ok. This is my new starting point! I’m 142 this morning and I’m heading downward!

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”


January 8, 2010 Posted by | Measurements, Numbers, Ugh! | Leave a comment


I must not have been sleeping particularly well last night because, where, I usually notice the digital clock a couple of times a night, I took note of it all night long!

I’ve posted before about numbers. I love them. I observe the patterns in numbers. Last night I saw 10:10, 11:11, grabbed the camera at 12:12, then saw 2:23, [missed it by one] 4:44 and 5:55. Granted, I’m usually awake at the two latest times, but this is Sunday morning and I could have been sleeping!

Where this all started:

I lived in Pennsylvania in a little cement home with then husband, Barry, Scott, Tracy and Cameron. One night I looked at the digital and it said 2:22. I didn’t think much of it, but when the next several nights in a row I woke up at exactly the same time and saw the clock at 2:22 I got a little scared. I actually attributed it to Satan. I thought he was trying to give me some kind of demonic message. I was afraid to go to sleep. I was frightened for me and my little family.

Well,  I resolved to change the experience into something else. I decided I was going to make 2:22 my lucky number. I took the matter into my own hands and determined for myself that Satan was going to have nothing to do with the entire situation. I remember feeling strong about it. I remember thinking [at the relatively young age of 26] it was my responsibility to protect myself and my family!

So bizarre! So bizarre!

So, fast forward 30+ years. I still see the clock several times a night or wake up just as it is turning to a sequential numeral. But I insist it’s a lucky moment in time. I maintain that God is aware of me and behave as though an angel from heaven is stopping by to say “hello my sweet.”

December 27, 2009 Posted by | Numbers, OCD, Silly | 2 Comments

ok, maybe a small problem!

After that last post, I realized my daughter, Tracy, had sent me this link to take a test on OCD.

If you have ever seen the TV series “Monk,” about a detective who has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, you are invited to participate in an online survey conducted by researchers in the Department of Communication at Georgia State University.

The survey asks for your opinions and feelings about “Monk,” and also asks questions about mental illness and the media. This research study will help us learn more about how people perceive and respond to media depictions of OCD and mental illness.

I know this is “off-topic” for your group: We randomly selected this group (along with more than 30 other yahoo groups) to receive the survey invitation, because we want to hear the attitudes and opinions of a wide sample of people. Please feel free to contact me with any questions.

If you are 18 or older, please click here to participate: http://www2.gsu.edu/~joucah/page2000.html

Ok, so maybe I do have OCD. But just a little! It’s not like I’m a clean freak!

December 20, 2009 Posted by | Numbers, OCD, Silly | 3 Comments


I love numbers. Not in a crazy way — I’m not into numerology -YUK.

But in a totally fun way. I love patterns. I love seeing patterns in numbers.

The other day I was ‘randomly’ [I don’t believe that for a minute!] picked [again] for a drug-alcohol screening for my part-time bus driving job. The gal who did the testing this time was the daughter of the usual lady, who I might add, I’ve gotten to know quite well, because it’s totally not random!

She was into patterns too. She loved the pattern in my social. [5858] She loved the pattern in my phone. [2222] Loved my P O Box. [777]

[Seriously, does the period go inside or outside the bracket?]

So I [went out on a limb, thinking I might have just found someone to connect with . . .] told her I count my levis going into the washer and then coming out of the washer. She’s like,”Really?” [I thought I heard something in her voice.]

No. No connection [what-so-ever.]

So, then, to just make polite conversation [since we were going to be stuck together for the next hour+ while I tried hard to produce a specimen with my diagnosable “shy bladder,” I told her how I adore numbers on the clock that are sequential. Ex. 12:34 and 11:11. Wow. Kind of a chill went through the room, making it even harder for me to want to produce.

An hour and fifteen minutes later I was able to give the required 2 ounces [this after drinking a quart and a half of lukewarm water, giving myself ultra pain in my stomach and kidneys, and having to p** for the next 12 hours.]

We politely said goodbye and I said to say hello to her mother. I turned around to watch her as she walked away and I think she was shaking her head and rolling her eyes just a little bit. Seriously?


I started this out about me liking numbers because I just got off the scale and I really like this number!!!!


December 20, 2009 Posted by | Goals, Numbers | Leave a comment