Weighing Matters

my journey to b.e.t.t.e.r

still yay!

Still 140, but it’s fast Sunday and I’m starving, so I need to take care and pay attention to the ‘natural sigh’ phenomenon and only eat until I’m pleasantly comfortable. This late Church business [1 pm – 4 pm] is pretty hard on fast Sunday. It’s 5:11 and I’m eating the first food of the day!

Some of the posts I read list the starting weight, goal weight and where I am in that process so today it’s 176/140/140! Yay! Or I could just say 161/140/140 for my most recent weight story. Still yay!

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January 3, 2010 Posted by | Goals, WooHoo, Yay! | Leave a comment

wooHOO!

I just walked in the door from a six-day ‘vacation’ visiting both Tracy’s family and staying overnight at Scott’s with a day in between at Jackson Hole. We had a blast! I swam until my fingers were similar in size and texture to raisins and took the opportunity to scrap off every possible bit of dead skin from my feet. [Sorry, fellow-swimmers.] Several times during our 4-hour swim I went off by myself and did 100 bicycles and 100 leg exercises swooshing the water back and forth as I moved my legs accordion-style together then apart. Fisher, Annesley and I also climbed to the top of the giant slide at least 15 times so my thighs were in knots. Were my legs ever sore this morning!

Anyway. On my way to the shower, I ripped off my clothes and jumped on the scale. 141! Actually would have been 140.5 but I ate a banana and apple on the way home. I’m so relieved. I worried about going on a trip because I don’t always have the opportunity [or committment] to eat like I want [need] to.

On the way home I listened to an hour-long radio show about New Year’s Resolutions and why they do or don’t work for the majority of people. Several callers explained their own successes or failures and I was drawn to the concept of looking back, evaluating and continuing on with successes. It’s the first time in perhaps four decades that I’m not beating myself up during Resolution Time, knowing I will give up or fail altogether by the end of January.

Let me say I don’t know, I don’t understand, why I was able to lose weight this time. I had tried so many, many times before, but for some reason it fell into place. I like to think it’s because I put it out there for public scrutiny. I blogged about every single pound. My niece, Sandi expressed her recent weight loss in the same vein, “The planets must all be aligned in the heavens,” adding to my belief that sometimes it just happens. There’s apparently no explanation why sometimes I can lose and sometimes I just can’t. Because for each success at weight loss, I’ve had dozens of failures.

My challenge now is to continue on, keep exercising [hard], choose healthy foods and treat myself as though I have value and purpose on this earth. Like I would treat a dear friend.

One of my favorite gifts is YOU!

I started reading this morning about 5 a.m. and can tell already it’s going to be my next obsession. What a storehouse of information for someone searching for better health, more knowledge and a goal-oriented way of approaching a change [a committment] in lifestyle.

I don’t want to re-gain. I had lost 35 pounds four years ago and gained back 20 of them just a couple of years later. [Thus my most recent endeavor to get back on track.] Please, if you see me and can tell I’m off track, encourage me to get right back on. Please don’t look away and pretend you didn’t notice. Get after me! [I’m speaking from experience here. I’ve done that with several friends who have lost enormous amounts of weight and then gained it all back — I pretended I didn’t notice.] [Gee, I love a well-placed bracket!] [I don’t think it does anyone any good to look away.] Just say, “Hey, I think you might be struggling. Is there anything I can do to encourage or help?” And then do it.

So I am signing up right here, in front of everyone, to stay focused, stay tuned, stay committed, stay on track. I certainly hope to be able to move on to goals in other areas of my life that have pretty much been put on hold since last May: Spiritual goals. Personal relationship goals. Emotional goals. Psychological goals. Mental/learning goals. One of those will move to the forefront as I continue to stay up with my physical goals.

I’ve said to myself for years: “If I could just get my weight under control other things will fall into place.”

Well, now’s the test.

January 2, 2010 Posted by | Goals, Yay! | Leave a comment

new new new

It’s the beginning of a new week. The Sabbath. I weigh 142.5 after a week of company, holiday goodies and too much food around the house. In a few days it’s a new year and a new decade — a great time for a new outlook and a new beginning. A while ago I posted the phrase “a new look, a new outlook.” And I know the two go hand-in-hand. Got to have the new outlook in order to stay with the new look. [Wow. 9 ‘new’s in that paragraph! — so obviously it’s my point!]

Mikelle and I were just discussing yesterday how many clothes I have stuffed in the closet. She recognized it’s because there are four sizes in there! I look at some of the clothes I wore six months ago and they are huge. Huge. And I don’t want to go back there. Even all the clothes I recently bought from Christopher and Banks that I thought were so attractive and complimentary are gigantic now, so I really need to pass them along, give them away, let go of them, even though I spent a whole lot of moolah.

Really, got to get rid of them. [Just trying to convince myself!]

My new way of thinking can’t be about ‘better hang on to them just in case . . . .’

We were goofing around and were wondering which one of us was smaller so we challenged each other to put on the other’s pants. Wow. They both fit perfectly! I am the same size as my 21-year-old daughter! I felt so good!

That’s what I’ve got to hang on to. Not a bunch of too-expensive, too-big clothing. I’ve got to hang on to what it feels like to be where I’m at. This is where I want to be until forever. 140 pounds, [still working on that!] size medium, size 10.

That’s the new me.

Yea!

December 27, 2009 Posted by | Celebration, Optimism, Yay! | Leave a comment

176-141=feeling good

OK world, I’m going to get brave here for thirty seconds and post my ‘before’ picture. This was taken in October 2005? 2006? at my Sister, Louise’s, mission farewell. I remember that day. I weighed 176. I also remember thinking I could hide behind those sun glasses. I couldn’t even really smile genuinely. Take a look at that arm. Holy cow! It has folds in it just above my elbow where I’m resting it on my Thigh of Gibraltar.

This picture, in all it’s glory, is on my fridge where I look at it many, many times a day. I have another smaller version in my purse right where I keep my money, so each time I stick my hand in there, I pull out this picture for a reality check.

***

Sister, Janet, took this next photo at our recent [12-12-09] Brother/Sister Christmas party and I’m much happier with it. I felt good. That’s my new pink sweater [Sam’s] and my slim jeans [Wal-mart]. I weighed 141 and just felt like I was starting to get it all together. I hope by next Christmas I’ll still fit into the same pants and that I’ll still be feeling strong and healthy. I’d really like to throw that green dress out, or give it to DI. I don’t know why I’ve been hanging onto it for 5 years!

From back left, Mel, Alice, me, Diane, Glenda, Eileen, Rob, Carol and Mike. Then front from left, Renita, Louise, my twin, Dave, and Janet. This is my family and I love each one of them so dearly!

***

I remember as a child seeing pictures of my Mother’s family all together, Grandma Rollins’ family, my dad’s brothers and sisters and all his aunts and uncles. Maybe in thirty years this will be the picture all the grandkids and grandkids are looking at and wondering who they are . . .

December 22, 2009 Posted by | Diet 101, Goals, Weight just a minute, Yay! | Leave a comment